Lessons We Learn From Our Pets

I read this quote by Christopher Hitchens on pets that every owner would have realised at some point.

“Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are gods.”

That is a true statement. Because you chose the kind of dog or pup you want. However, a kitten chooses you to take care of it. A cat won’t allow just anybody to pet it. 

Isn’t that interesting, it almost feels like the cat is saying, “I don’t think you are good enough to be in my presence.”

Revisiting A Long Forgotten Childhood Memory

In the last week of February, my husband and I were driving in the streets of Ironshore. Ironshore is an upscale community in the outskirts of Montego Bay, Jamaica. There are some beautiful houses in this neighbourhood. Anyway! As we drove towards the A1 highway, my husband suddenly exclaimed, “Seema chintha gubbalu!”. I had no clue what he was referring to.

He stopped the car by the sidewalk and asked if I saw them on the tree nearby. I explained to him that I am hearing that word for the first time. He pointed to a tall tree in a piece of wasteland by the road. Before I could get a good glimpse of the tree, he got out of the car and walked towards the tree.

He picked a delicate, pink and white pod that was curled up and appeared to have burst open. He showed it to me and said that these trees were commonly found in and around his village in India. He ate them a lot as a child.

The scientific name of this fruit is Pithecellobium dulce. I did a little research to know that these trees a commonly found in Asia, Central America, Mexico and South America. It is called by different names in different regions. The bark, fruit, seeds of this tree are used to treat various ailmentsKaushik V. Kulkarni and Varsha R. Jamakhandi from the College of Pharmacy in India have explained a few interesting facts about the tree. The uses of Pithecellobium dulce are described in the Journal of Pharmacognosy and Phytochemistry. It can be accessed at this website:

https://www.phytojournal.com/archives/2018/vol7issue2/PartJ/7-1-390-353.pdf.

The pods of Seema Chintha burst open on the tree when they become ripe and ready for eating. They taste sweet when ripe yet have a mild sour taste at the same time. The best way to describe the flavour is like chewing on fresh rose petals that were sweet. After eating the first one, I couldn’t stop. I ate them all, one after another.

After picking a bunch of pods from the tree, we separated the delicate white fruit from the pod, removed the black seeds and washed them thoroughly before devouring them. I couldn’t help notice the delicate white flowers hanging down. They were so beautiful and feathery that I decided not to touch them. Bees and wasps were hovering around too.
For now, I am going to leave you with this last picture of this Seema Chintakaya. For my husband, this was a wonderful memory brought back from his childhood.

Mother – A Wondrous Angel

We recently celebrated Mothers Day on May 9th. I wanted to do something special for my mother on that day. Since we could not take her out for dinner or get her any gifts due to the Covid 19 situation, I thought I will give her a break and handle her workload for the day. I thought that was equivalent to a day off at a resort if she does not have to cook and clean all day. I was in for a surprise.

All through the day, my mother kept interfering with my work. She was not able to relax and enjoy her holiday. My mom was constantly following me around the house as I worked. She was not relaxing in front of the TV or pursuing any of her hobbies. I thought that she might be worried that I am not doing a good job.

When I asked her what she would like to eat, my mom listed stuff that dad or I enjoy eating. She would insist on cooking it herself as a thank you for doing the housework. I was confused and told her that this was her mothers day gift. She should not thank me for it. My mother and I ended up arguing about her reason for not relaxing and enjoying the holiday.

By the end of the day, I realized that the whole idea was causing damage rather than being a gift. I sat her down and asked her what her problem was. I see that she could not relax even for a day and would interfere at every step. I gently prodded to see if she did not appreciate the gift. The answer she gave me was an insight into how a mother thinks.

She said she did not want a holiday from the housework though she appears to complain about it. She said that she complains so that we would work along with her. She felt she has a connection and communication line with us while we do the work. She was following me around the house and interfering in the work, only to start a conversation with me. She had no particular favourites in her mind because all the foods that we, her children, love bring back memories of us as kids. Every time she cooked my favourite dish, she reminisced on an incident where I was happy. That made her happy.

A mother doesn’t want a holiday from her responsibilities. She just wants her children to connect back with her in a way we did when we were young. She wants to feel relevant in our lives, especially now that we have become independent. Knowing this, I asked her for a redo of the gift. I promised to help her in the kitchen whenever I can. That way, she can teach me recipes I already know. I would help her clean the house, and she can teach me the importance of cleanliness all over again. This would be the best gift I could think of.

When Mom Is Away, Pups Are At Play

As I was cleaning up my folder of photos, I stumbled upon a set of photographs from a few years back. They brought back fond memories of 2 pups in my neighbourhood. They were the most mischievous pups but had the most adorable face, as is the case with all puppies.

The pups were barely a few months old at the time when my aunt had to step out on some urgent work. These two pups had been veritable angels until then, so my aunt left them out in the yard to play while she finished her work. This decision proved to be her mistake.

My aunt took two hours to finish her work and return home. The pups utilised this window of opportunity to explore the lotus pond and redecorate the yard. This is what greeted her when she returned; two energetic pups who proudly displayed their creativity.

My aunt was shocked beyond words that her angels could come up with such mischief. She had to tie them up to the gate and use the water hose to wash away all the mud and dirt. While my aunt was fussing over how to clean them and the yard, we kids had a laugh taking pictures of the dogs and their antics.

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It is a memory of a fun day that brings a smile to us all.

Greetings 2021!!

Welcome 2021!!

I wish all my readers, fellow bloggers and friends, A Very Happy New Year!!

In the past, I would have wished everyone for an exciting year ahead, that was filled with travel, adventure and parties with friends. Considering what happened in 2020 and the new social norms, I have updated my new year wish for everyone.

I wish everyone good health, a safe home, company of your good friends and peace of mind.

For this New year, let us make a resolution to take care of our health. Be patient and tolerant with everyone around us. Stop judging people before we know the complete story.

Here’s to wishing everyone a Happy New Year and a Joyous year ahead.

The Festival Of Lights

There are many festivals in India, some are specific to a region, some specific to a community etc. Different people celebrate different festivals with varying degrees of enthusiasm and pomp. But there are a few festivals that are celebrated throughout India and the most important among them is Diwali, the festival of lights.

There are different mythologies associated with Diwali in North India and South India. However, the importance of the day is constant. One group celebrates the day as the return of Lord Rama back to Ayodhya after his victory over Ravana and his subsequent coronation. To another group, it marks the defeat of the evil king Narakasura at the hands of Satyabhama. Anyway, I am not here to give mythology lessons on Diwali. I just want to reminisce fond memories from my childhood.

The day before Diwali, it is a tradition to wake up before sunrise, have a bath and get ready for puja. We all gathered at our grandparents’ house for the aarti to pray for our siblings. It was also a time to collect gifts from them. As children, this was the best part that we all waited for, The Gifts. Next all of us cousins could pool our money and buy extra crackers for the evening and start bursting them. On the day of Diwali, since my grandfather and my uncles are all architects, we did special pujas at the office and then started to burst crackers. This is where all the fun happened.

I remember that I was a wuss when it was time to burst noisy crackers. I just enjoyed the sparklers and flower pots. The minute anyone lit up Laxmi bombs or rockets, I would run and hide behind the next tallest person. I had to bear the brunt of ridicule from my cousin’s for it. But we forgot all about it when we saw the bright colours light up the sky. Though it has been a few years since we consciously stopped bursting crackers, we spend that time on our terrace safely watching the fireworks at others house.

Here are some snaps of Diwali this year:

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My Fascination For Sarees

When I was a child, all the women around me were dressed in sarees. As an Indian, it is not uncommon to see everyone in sarees. Aunts, grandmas, cousins were all draped in colourful and gorgeous sarees. A saree can be described as a rectangular piece of unstitched cloth material which is six to nine yards long and two to four feet wide. Typically, we drape a saree around us using a petticoat and couple it with a crop top. The way we drape the saree varies from region to region in India.  

 As I mentioned in an earlier post, I used to be filled with curiosity and admiration for my mom’s saree collection. I used to spend several hours feeling every material and admiring the colours and prints on the sarees. 

  “Zari” is a type of thread made of gold or silver. It is common to use zari threads to weave the saree, especially near the borders. The pattern that runs along the length of the saree is called the “border” and the elaborate designs at the end of the saree covering the entire width are called the “pallu”. Pallu is also the part of the saree that hangs over the shoulder.

Sarees have different names depending on the kind of material (thread) that is used to weave the fabric, the place from where the weaver’s hail and some times the technique that was used to weave the sarees. 

Some traditional saree varieties found in India are Pochampally, Kalamkari, Kanchipuram silk, Mysore silk, Kerala – Kasavu, Sambhalpuri, Ikat, Murshidabad, Batik, Tussar silk, Assam – Muga silk, Paithani, Kolhapuri, Bandhani, Patola, Garchola, Kota, Leheriya, Maheshwari, Chanderi, Bhagalpuri silk, Kuchai silk, Benarasi silk, Chikankari, Phulkari, Kashmiri Kadai etc. Apart from these traditional sarees, the popular ones today are chiffon, georgette, organza, linen etc.

The cost of a saree may depend on different factors: Silk sarees are more expensive compared to cotton. Some sarees have heavy embroidery that requires more material and labour. Sarees from a particular region might have a high demand making them pricier. Labour costs may vary according to the effort that is put. 

 Different sarees feel different on the skin. Natural fabrics like cotton, kadhi, sheer sarees allow easy passage of air and thus comfortable for hot summers. Velvet and silk sarees are slightly warmer making them favourable for winter. Chiffons and georgettes are light and dry quickly so they are suitable for the monsoon.

 Saree colours range from light and delicate shades to bright and vibrant colours. Casual and office wear sarees are either totally devoid of special embellishments like beads, mirrors, embroidery, flashy borders etc. They are either plain coloured or simple printed sarees. The party-wear and wedding sarees are the ones that have a lot of heavy embroideries, zari work, beadwork etc.

I could spend days talking about sarees but I would like to stop here. I want to hear from you. What do you think of sarees? What is your favourite style of clothing? Please comment below and share your opinions. Have a blessed day! 

Back In The Day, When I Was Young…

Most conversations with elders and senior citizens, neighbours or relatives winds down to the statement,” back in my days, things were…..”
I always took that statement as an indicator of the age of the person I am speaking to. This made me feel young, however, I recently used this statement while speaking to an office colleague. You can imagine my horror, I was suddenly faced with the reality that I am ageing as well. I did not want to accept that reality, so I tried to explain away my statement as a slip of tongue.

Excuses apart, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the statement is more about hope or the lack of it than it is about the age of the speaker.

When we are young, we are full of hope and belief in a better future. We may face bad times, corrupt officials, inflation, economic downturns and more, but our hope that tomorrow will be better is what keeps us going. We believe that this too shall pass. This hope and positivity will keep us from looking back at the past with sadness. We have faith in our hard work and hope that tomorrow our luck will turn around.

Once we begin to lose hope of a better future, we start to use statements like, back in my times. We accept defeat in the face of hardships, or when we throw in the towels and say, ‘this is it, I’m done’. It is a way of accepting that nothing good can happen anymore, Our rosy picture of the future suddenly seems out of reach or impossible. This phase has more to do with losing hope and faith rather than age.

Just as one loses hope, one can also find hope and rebuild faith too. Be it through planning, God, family support or a simple change is luck. Once we start to turn things around for ourselves, we automatically stop looking back in sadness.

My Thoughts On The World Right Now

Hello, Friends! I apologize for not posting any new blogs in the past month. It has been difficult for all folks around the world with the Coronavirus pandemic. I would like to thank all those who are working on the frontline as doctors, nurses, paramedical staff, police and security personnel, armed forces and all the other health workers and delivery workers.

I praise them, not just for their dedication and service, but more importantly for their mental fortitude and resilience. They work tirelessly in the face of grim statistics and grimmer predictions. Despite staying at home and working from the safety of my house, I still fear for the future. It is not just the virus that is cause for concern. The blaming games, the ‘he said..they said’, and oneupmanship that we see in the news, now a day is really saddening.

It disheartens me to see that man cannot let go of petty politics, conspiracy theories, spreading fake news and taking cheap potshots in the name of social justice/responsibility. Every side wants to use this pandemic to make the opposite side look bad. It makes me wonder, is our pride and ego bigger than life? Can we not let it go and work together for once? I know that I am speaking of a utopian world that has no link to reality, but one can hope, can’t we?

All this sad news aside, I have realised that everyone is just doing what they are best at. The doctors, nurses, police, governments, opposition parties, news channels, our bosses, everyone just going about handling the pandemic the best way they can. So, why shouldn’t I? Why am I getting worried or feeling depressed? I came to the conclusion that to help with this situation, I should also get back to doing my job of staying at home and working to make things easy for the ones who are fighting it. There is no point in going on the streets protesting, spreading hatred, conspiracies and fake news. The best help I can give is to stay out of the way and not cause problems.

Counting My Blessings This Year

Hello readers!!
This year has been a memorable one for me due to various reasons. Some good reasons and some not so good reasons. You might say that is what life is about. There are ups and downs in everyone’s life. I have shared a few significant events of my life with you through my blog posts.

My year started out with high hopes and grand plans. The mood was upbeat, with the buzz of activity. As we were renovating our house, the world looked brighter and, I felt optimistic.

I have started my blog this year….that is definitely a happy memory. It has become a means to channel and compartmentalise my thoughts into valuable lessons. I would have forgotten them otherwise.

I have made some new friends this year. I became acquainted with some great people that inspire me and motivate me to work harder.

I have witnessed the loss of a dear cousin. I may not have been very open with my affection for this brother, but I sorely miss him.p

I also attended the marriage of a niece and a nephew. They were such joyful occasions that brought the whole family together.

As I keep counting the events of the year, I realised that despite the dreary mood, my year had been a reasonably fortunate one. In the face of some unfortunate news, I overlooked all the good things that happened to me. Isn’t this a typical situation? We are stuck on one news (it could be good or bad) and we ignore all the rest of the world. We even fail to see how that single event fits into the grander scheme of life events.

It Is The Season To Spread Joy

It is Christmas time. I know, most of you are thinking, ‘no shit Sherlock’. My point is that it is Christmas time and it is the time to spread joy, love and brotherhood. If you are a feminist, then it is sisterhood too.

Most of us immediately run to buy gifts, clothes and cards when we speak of spreading joy. Moreover, these gifts are shared with friends, family and loved ones. I know that this is a tradition, it reminds us of all that family time.

But, I ask you whether this is the true meaning of spreading joy. As far as I can see, most of us me included, share our love with the people we know. We mingle and spend time with loved ones. How is that spreading joy? When we say spread the joy, it should go outside of our known circle of people.

This Christmas, try to reach out to that friend or neighbour that we are no longer in touch with. Try to speak to those that we usually choose to ignore. Make an effort to mend fences with an estranged member of family or friends. I believe that would be the true meaning of spreading joy and love.

By doing this, you are reaching out to those you don’t exactly love. You are including and expanding your circle. Your friends and family get your time all year long. It is time someone new also gets your love and a share in your joy.

I plan to practice this and hope you do too. Tell me in the comments about how successful you have been.
Merry Christmas!!